Recently, I had two experiences that were tons of fun.  The both were over lunch having conversations with co-workers.  Now, maybe what energized me was that I selected the topic and maybe did much of the talking.

It is similar to what I imagine what public speakers feel.  With a receptive and engaged audience, who wouldn't like talking about topics that interest them?  It's the same idea of watching a TV show that I really enjoy.  It is difficult to imagine that other people wouldn't also enjoy the program or even that they might hate it.

So, instead of trying to convince other people to like the same TV programs I like, how about just trying to find those people that already like that program?  In the same thinking, instead of focusing too much on trying to convince others, how about just focusing on finding those that already want what we have.

Now, I think it is a little of both.  It is somewhat finding those that are already interested and also about changing the way we present ourselves to be more acceptable to others.  I'm not sure if this is really  a productive thought pattern.  How do successful / influential people behave?

Through history, how do leaders behave?  At some point, they definitely take a position and use various methods to influence others to go with them.  One way, is to start with small steps.  Yes, this is a key.  If we can always get people to do something where they think it is already something they want to do.

OK, so if I went to a stranger and said, would you pay me $100,000 for my services, or asked a pretty strange woman to marry me, the chance of success is probably low because these are not things that they have considered in their reality and not what they want.  Instead, what if I asked either of them to share a cup of coffee/tea with me, or even to ask them for the time of day?  These are small enough requests that they are probably more open.

I can see how this can be a lot about what prospecting and leading are about.  It is about using time as an ally to allow us to develop small requests into gradually larger requests.  Now one thing to figure out would be how quickly can you go from a small request to a larger request.  It is probably faster than you might think with the proper system.

One rule of thumb I have heard is 7 hours of quality contact time should be enough to convert a prospect into a customer.  This would mean if someone is not willing to exchange money for some service I offer, than it might be time to start focusing on other prospects.  This is simply a benchmark, though if you are spending 3 times or 5 times as much as this without any results it might be time to seriously consider changing your methods.

So the idea is take baby steps and get them saying "Yes" as much as possible and gradually moving more and more in the direction you want.
 


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